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Heart, Head, Life: Hand it to me

Sunday, March 13, 2011

I am starting a new match-making website. It will be super hi-tech and make use of bio-metric palm mapping. It’s so simple that I can’t believe that no-one else ever thought of this before. I mean don’t we all know that the right hand indicates the future of our partner, and the left hand indicates our own future? (the reverse for men). So it seems only logical to me that the easiest way to determine whether or not two people are meant to be together is by matching palms, because each holds the other's destiny in his or her hands. In fact, you should try this sometime – if you find a guy or gal that you think might be the one – hold up opposing hands – and if it tingles, well then it’s time for the jingle. This also is actually how the handshake came about. But fathers found too many men palming their daughters, so there was a collective decision to reserve the handshake for formal interactions between men.

This palm matching thing is also the reason why couples walk hand in hand. If we were all aware of this, life would be so much simpler. You wouldn’t need a wedding ring or small talk. There would be just two gestures. The fist and the palm.  Those who have found their mates would just show you a fist instead of the finger, and those still searching would walk around with an open palm. Probably singing “Allah ke naam pe lele baba”

So does this really work?

You wish! Any similarities in palms actually indicates the converse. That you might be siblings. The ancients who came with that ‘right-hand is your partner’s’ wisdom were rather incestuous I must say!

Ok ok, the facts

Palm lines are as unique as your fingerprints. And don’t change until you die and decompose. The biological reason behind palm lines is to help you grasp things. Just look at your palm and observe as you fold it. Do you see how the creases appear where your palm folds? In science the head and heart lines are called transverse creases, and the life line is called the longitudinal radial crease. Quite a mouthful isn’t it? But very useful as well. Biologists can read your palm the same way palmists do. This science is called Dermatoglyphics.

Click to enlarge
Albert Einstein was famously considered autistic and hand analysis seems to confirm it. You can read more about it here: http://palmistryreport.wordpress.com/2009/01/29/famous-hands-the-hands-of-albert-einstein-iq-autism-left-handedness/

And here’s the funny fact

Your palm creases actually do tell you of the matters of your heart. Matters to do with a sick heart that is. Biologically sick that is. A trained observer can determine diseases – physical or psychological – that you may be carrying. They will be able to predict your ailments, and at some level psychologically profile you as well. This is why you will find some alternative medicine practitioners studying your hands intently. In fact traditional Chinese medicine can determine organ health by observing different creases/ridges on your palm. Modern science as well is now able to draw relations between palmar crease patterns and cancers, prenatal damages in infants, heart abnormalities, down’s syndromes, and many other diseases. There are also tons of intelligence tests built around dermataloglyphical knowledge and most of them are very similar to what palmistry propogates. So I'd sprinkle some salt on that.

But now palmistry doesn’t appear that cocokamabully does it?


Johnpaul said...

Wow! What a great post. One of my favorites you have ever written.Well done, fantastic article. Thanks a lot for sharing alternative medicine